Some people, try to tell others how to feel. You are foolish for feeling that way they say. They say you should be happy or you should be sad about some situation. The thing is you shouldn’t tell a person how they feel. It will only make a person more upset. Let me tell you a story.
A teenage girl fell in love with this boy. Head over heels. They thought they love each other very much. Adults say you’re not in love, you don’t like him. It’s just puppy love. Even though what the adults say may be true it is still calling the girls feelings stupid. No feelings are stupid, and I hate when adults say that to teenagers. The girl and her boyfriend breaks-up, and she thinks it’s the end of the world. The parents say that it wasn’t going to last anyway.Don’t be sad. Well that makes things worse.
You can’t tell a person how they should feel. How can you disregard their feelings just because you don’t understand why they feel this way. Just listen to them. If you give advice when they just want someone to talk to, they will probably not want to talk about their problems to you again. Like I said in my other post “Talk to Someone”, it is important to talk to someone. Talking is crucial and, if you say they shouldn’t be feeling this way and, judging someone will not make them feel comfortable talking to you again.
Listen to their problems, comfort them, don’t criticize their feelings, and don’t judge. Don’t give advice unless they ask for it. If you really did break-up with your bf or gf cry it out if you feel like it.
Peace and Love
In this day and age where we all are busy, we never have a chance to spend time with family. The teenagers want to spend most of their time with friends, and the parents work a lot. Don’t get me wrong nothing is wrong with working, and nothing is wrong with hanging out with people your own age. But some families get to the point where they don’t even know each other anymore.
That is probably why teenagers and parent don’t connect like they should besides the whole teenagers trying to find your own identity thing. They are afraid that their parents might judge them because they spend enough time together to build trust. My worries is that parents get to that point where they don’t know what their children are doing.
How do you not know that your daughter has boyfriend?
How do you not know your son is having unprotected sex?
How do you not know you child brought a torture weapon?
How do you not know that your child is unhappy?
I understand some people are single parents, so they have to work a lot. You can still try to have a night with the family. I know most teens will think a family night is lame but you can have a lot of conversations with each other to build that trust again. Your child will feel more comfortable to tell you more thing, if you are not quick to judge. You can also try to eat at the kitchen table with the family. A lot of stuff comes out at the kitchen table.
They might not tell you most of the things that are going in their social life right away but here are the things that a parent should know about their teen.
1. Who their friends are.
2. What are their hobbles. (If you are a parent who doesn’t know your children hobbies, all I have to say is wow)
3. How are they feeling.
I am in no way saying that parents and teens should be friends, but in my opinion a parent and their child bond should be strong. Children shouldn’t become friends with their parents until they become parents themselves. You should trust one another like a person would trust a friend but they should be able trust each other more. Parent should still keep boundaries but don’t lose that relationship because your child may have a secret life that you probably don’t even know about.
Don’t forget to tell your kids that you love them, because I’m pretty sure they love you too.